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Tag Archives: Immortal Heroes

Sempervians, Reborn, Ultras, Risen, Changelings, and Terran Ghosts are all included in this list of immortal heroes.

In this scene from Bringer of Chaos: Forged in Fire, Pietas has a psychic fight with his sister, Dessy. Having seen Pietas performing a ritual for their people with a human, she adjusts the “mask” he’s wearing. (He’d pretended to put it on, but due to the urgency of the situation, there’s nothing on his face.) When Pietas takes affront, twins Armand and Philippe try to take her side.

A Psychic Fight

A psychic fight is chaos #SciFi #SpaceOpera #MFRWhooksDessy slid one fingertip across an area below one of his eyes. “There.” She dusted off her hands. “That’s better.”

“What did you do?”

“Since you didn’t have a real partner for your ritual, I fixed your mask.” She shot him a humorless, sneering smile. “You missed a spot.”

Ire flooded Pietas. He gripped Dessy’s wrist and yanked her to him.

The shock on her face gave way to indignation. “Let go!” She jerked her arm but he held her fast. She shoved him.

He didn’t budge, refusing to let her win.

She bombarded him with her empathic senses. The psychic melee of anger and rage stung worse than an ice storm, but pain had never stopped him. “I’m warning you, Pietas. Let go of me!”

“Or what?” He shot back his own and added a trickle of Wilt, a demand for surrender. “You’ll tell Daddy?”

Her inborn Ultra gift of Compulsion pushed at his mind, willing Pietas to release her. His sister had mastered the psychic ability as a toddler. He’d been four before he grasped the concept. Seven before he’d mastered it.

But he’d been born immune.

Another wave of outrage pummeled him, but it did no more good than the first.

“Pietas!” Dessy stamped her foot. “Let go or so help me–” She threw her other hand up, fingers spread.

The world tilted, disorienting him, no longer than it took to blink.

“Did you throw Chaos at me?” He patted his chest. “They call me Bringer of Chaos because it’s my strongest gift.” He yanked her up hard and brought his face close to hers. “Shall I show you?”

“No! No, Pietas, don’t.” She quit fighting. “Let me go.”

“I will not play games with you, Sister.” He loosened his grip, allowing her freedom. Even as furious as she’d made him, he refused to hurt her. “Did you think I wouldn’t know what you were doing? Telling me I ‘missed a spot’ was a play for power.”

“Power?” Dessy’s eyes flashed, their deep-winter-ice darkening to sooty gray. She settled herself and lifted her chin, regarding him with all the cold calculation of a paid temptress seeking whatever customer held the most cash. “I’m your sister. How can you say that to me?”

“How? Because two thousand years of attitude. Because you haven’t changed one bit. You’re more manipulative than ever.”

She rubbed her wrist, softening her expression. Tears welled. She folded her hands as if in prayer and placed them along her cheek. “I didn’t mean to do anything wrong. Don’t be angry with me.”

“Save it. That hasn’t worked on me since I was a boy.”

“Oh, Pietas.” She sniffed. “I’m sorry. Didn’t you realize I was playing? I’ve missed you. I wanted to be part of your ritual, that’s all.” Her voice broke on the last.

Armand and Philippe whipped toward her faster than trained puppies.

Pietas threw the compulsion to stop.

They halted, their wills frozen by the conflicting psychic demands.

Dessy reverted to her temptress self, glaring at him with a dare. “You’re the one who hasn’t changed. You countermand everything. You’re the same pain in the–”

“Dessy!” Pietas bent down to her. “You’ve been the queen of fake tears since you were two and discovered they got you out of punishment. They might have worked on our father but they will not work on me. Save it.”

“You let that human do the ritual with you! There’s nothing worth less than a human.” She sent a snarling glance Six’s way. “Except a dead one.”


Book Hooks is a weekly meme hosted by Marketing for Romance Writers as part of the MFRW Authors Blog. It’s a chance each week for you the reader to discover current WIP or previously published book by possibly new-to-you authors.
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There are times when you love something but must give it up because a) it’s not good for you, b) someone else needs it more, c) it’s broken beyond repair, d) you’ve moved past it, e) when it’s perfectly fine but it simply doesn’t do what it needs to do. In other words, when it’s wrong.

When You Love It

I’m changing the cover of my book, Bringer of Chaos: Forged in Fire. I’ve adored this cover from day one. I wooed a talented artist (Brumae) into doing it and was happy to pay her fee. She was easy to work with and did a wonderful job. I would hire her for other images in a heartbeat.

Unfortunately, the cover came across as more urban fantasy than science fiction. Everyone loved the art — but it didn’t work for the story. One person said, “Something’s wrong but I don’t know what.” It was subtle but it didn’t “click” with the story. She didn’t know exactly what was wrong. She just knew something was.

There were a few other comments as well.

  • Too many words
  • Large red font was hard to read
  • Angle of the title made it hard to read
  • Too busy
  • Cluttered

Ack. Those were hard to take, but I needed to hear them. Even with these errors people still thought the artwork itself was stunning. But when it doesn’t fit the genre, it’s wrong. Here are the two sets of covers for both books 1 and 2. What do you think? The old covers are on the left.

 

But It’s Wrong

A good cover sells the book. It entices readers to pick it up and have a closer look. Although this was a gorgeous cover with beautiful artwork, the readers I was trying to reach were passing it right on by. I had to admit I’d chosen the wrong part of the story to accentuate. Time to make a change.

I chose a different image, one of a planet with extensive volcanic activity. The blues harmonized well with the first cover and the reds fit the story’s title, Forged in Fire. It has a sense of movement and life. It’s uncluttered. I removed the line “Sempervian Saga” and its logo. I’ll put that elsewhere, perhaps inside the book during the next update. These books are in the Bringer of Chaos series, which is part of the overall Sempervian Saga. I have other books in that larger saga as well.

I tilted the word “Bringer” 90 degrees clockwise and moved “of” to a different location. Then I resized the entire phrase and put it near the bottom, in much smaller type. I kept the font. It’s called Sabotage, by the way, and you can get it on www.dafont.com for free. That font absolutely fits the man known as the Bringer of Chaos.

So there you have it. Lovely cover. Not working. Changes made. I’ll let you know how this book fares.

The only downside? I made about a hundred banners with the old cover on them. Now I have to decide which ones work best and which ones don’t. Here we go again…


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Book Hooks is a weekly meme hosted by Marketing for Romance Writers as part of the MFRW Authors Blog. It’s a chance each week for you the reader to discover current WIP or previously published book by possibly new-to-you authors.

Guarantee? Not for a human #Pietas #SciFi #MFRWhooksYou have no guarantee, human… Pietas is not, shall we say, “fond” of humans? He has good reason.


When the immortal Pietas is marooned on a barren world with no food and few survival tools, he knows it could be worse. He could be alone. But that’s the problem. He’s not.

Half a million of his people sleep in cryostasis, trapped inside their pods and it’s up to Pietas to save them. He can’t release one at a time. It’s all or nothing. He’s facing over five hundred thousand hungry, thirsty, homeless, immortals all looking to him for answers.

It’s not all bad. The beautiful telepathic warrior he’s loved for lifetimes is at his side. He’s bonded with a sentient panther. He hates humans but the one dumped on this planet with him has become a trusted friend.

But before Pietas can build shelter, figure out how to grow food, or set up a government, he must take back command from a ruthless enemy he’s fought for centuries. His brutal, merciless father.

Immortals may heal, but a wound of the heart lasts forever…

Human, you have no guarantee

This is the foreword of Bringer of Chaos: Forged in Fire, from Pietas, the hero.

You’re human. Lies are your nature.
Truth is mine. Honoring my word means more to me than life.
Humans are craven, contemptible and reprehensible supplanters of power. You lack the truth.
Traitors among my kind lied to you. They concealed themselves among you and claimed we were myth. They fed you false hope. Told you you were safe. Lulled you into complacent ignorance. Manipulated, confused, and desensitized you.
You chose to believe their lies.
You’ve heard tales of visitors from outer space. Stories of aliens who walk among you. You called them urban legends, myths, tall tales for the campfire, untrue.
You refused to believe the truth.
This book relates my tale but is not from my point of view. Call it Science Fiction, but it happened. I exist. My dimension is not yours. You have not been aware of me–until now–but I know everything about you.
To honor a worthy human friend, I considered sparing humanity. I have since seen the folly of blanket exemption. Not all of you deserve to die, but there are requirements for being protected. Will I choose you?
I offer no guarantee. Your fate is a bequest no one can usurp.
Believe me.
Read this, if you dare to know the truth.
~ Pietas


Bringer of Chaos: Forged in Fire by Kayelle Allen
Science fiction with romantic elements
Rated PG13 for violence (no explicit content or profanity)
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Read book 1: Bringer of Chaos: the Origin of Pietas, available free on Kindle Unlimited
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Pietas sings like an angel but his voice can kill #Pietas #SciFi #MFRWhooksBook Hooks is a weekly meme hosted by Marketing for Romance Writers as part of the MFRW Authors Blog. It’s a chance each week for you the reader to discover current WIP or previously published book by possibly new-to-you authors. Pietas Sings features a scene from Bringer of Chaos: Forged in Fire.

The immortal Pietas plans to use his voice as a means of healing his mother, who is critically ill. His human friend, Six, is nearby. Some people are adversely affected by the tones Pietas’s voice generates, and some…die.

Pietas had killed countless humans, but he’d never sung in front of one.

The human would hear each note. However, his anti-emo chip might block the effect. Even if it did hurt Six, as much as he loved his friend, if singing returned his mother’s health, Pietas could not hold back. Six would understand.

Would it affect the panther, Pretosia?

When he sang, birds and insects took wing. He’d never sung around big cats. From what he’d gathered, these panthers had been bred as warriors. If they were like other working animals, they might appear unaware, while detecting the slightest sound, scent, and vibration.

The acoustics might be better if he sang into the cave instead of out, but even with Six behind him, he could not turn his back to the exit.

Not yet.

Had he retained his voice? He’d recovered his other gifts, as much as he could tell, and had vast improvements in his ability to speak mind-to-mind. Could he still sing? Time to find out.

To keep his voice from going too deep, Pietas placed tongue against teeth and made an extended zzz sound, then did a few lip trills. After a few deep breaths, he lifted his head and hummed. Nothing different in the feel of his throat or vocal chords. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught sight of Six. To keep from being distracted, he focused on a spot on the cave’s mouth while he continued his warm-up. Starting with middle C, he sang simple ooh sounds up and down the scale.

His mother remained still as death, a slight rise and fall of her chest revealing she breathed. Her white uniform showed less wear than what the others wore, but it was soiled and stained. How it must have chafed her pride to wear such a garment.

Pietas launched into song. The notes filled the air, their tone pure and clear. The joy of it filled him as he sang. Before the end of the first stanza, his mother opened her eyes. He continued, song after song, vocalizing each word of each line, every song he knew. Words full of victory, honor, duty, pride.

Six drew himself up, his back ramrod straight. Perhaps that chip did less good than Pietas thought.

The harmonics in his voice generated pleasure ranging from simple enjoyment to rapturous gratification. Some experienced anger, depression, or terror. His voice also possessed curative powers. Not as strong as those with the healing gift called Smooth, but enough to revive the critically ill or injured and keep them alive until help came.

No other Ultra had such a voice. Though he loved music and possessed absolute pitch, Pietas never performed in public.

He started an old battle hymn about steel and guts, iron and flesh, the wings and teeth and claws of a killing machine. Glorious for soldiers, yet his fragile, scientist mother moved her hand, keeping time with the music. She drew a long, sighing breath and released it as if she’d held it an eternity.

Flushed and sweating, Six panted as if he’d been running.

A battle song of warriors in flight came next. He sang of the scorched and blackened soil of the conquered and the poetic justice of fire raining from the sky.

Color suffused his mother’s cheeks. She took his hand.

Six turned his back, shoulders rounded, head down.

To end, Pietas chose a slow song of war in a minor key. The ancient tune was a favorite the night after battle and it suited both baritones and tenors. Forged in Fire fit them as exiles. Pietas hummed to set the key, then released the true power of his voice.

Tears filled his eyes by the time he reached his favorite stanza.

We can’t forget. We won’t forgive. We must return. We shall avenge.
We never quit. We do not sway. Our enemies–we will repay.
An Ultra’s heart is forged in fire. An Ultra’s heart is forged in fire. An Ultra’s heart is forged in fire.

When he finished, the silence was absolute.

From Bringer of Chaos: Forged in Fire

What if you were marooned on a barren world? What if you had no food and few survival tools? What if you’d been genetically engineered and no matter how agonizing the wound, you’d survive.

It could be worse. You could be here alone. But that’s the problem. You’re not.

You’re trapped with a ruthless enemy you’ve fought for centuries.

Talk about being forged in fire…

Available for preorder on Amazon Nov 11-Dec 28. Purchase on Dec 29, 2017
Free on Kindle Unlimited
http://amzn.to/2ABIcCI


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How do you write an angry character? #AmWriting #SciFi #MFRWhooksWelcome to this week’s Book Hooks, a snippet or intro to a book to whet the appetite and invite you to check out more.
Anyone could show anger when they are wronged. If someone steals from you, or cheats you, you’ll be furious, and rightfully so. But what if you have a character whose nature seems to exhibit more anger than usual? This is often true of a villain, but anger can be a problem for heroes and heroines as well.

Writing an angry character

Anger often comes from environment. Hunger, abuse, neglect, poverty, unjust treatment, lack of freedom — all these can lead to anger. If you’re writing an angry character, here are some things to consider for their back-story.

How do you write an angry character? Here are some insights. #AmWriting Click To Tweet

The Passively Angry character

While most of the time, we know quite well when we’re angry, that is not always the case. An angry character might not express anger out of fear of reprisal, or to keep from hurting someone. But they might lash out in passive ways. Here are several.

  • Apathy
  • Sarcasm
  • Meanness
  • Alienating family
  • Alienating friends
  • Self-defeating behaviors
  • Being awkward or rude in social situations
  • Failing to perform in a professional situation

Often, people experiencing passive anger do not realize it (at least at first). Others might think the character is intentionally sabotaging himself. He may not able to explain his actions. He is “out of sorts” and grumpy.

In one of my earlier books, Pietas fits this bill perfectly, and he knows it. Here’s a quote from Alitus. “What was that word you used last time? Oh yes, ‘fractious.’ What an entertaining word. ‘Likely to be troublesome.’ That was my favorite definition. It fits me, don’t you think? ‘Pietas tends to be fractious.’ A true statement. So, sister, you know I become ‘fractious’ when I’m annoyed. And you have annoyed me greatly today.”

The Aggressively Angry character

When a character expresses anger aggressively, he is fully aware of what he’s feeling. There’s no wavering. That doesn’t mean they know the root cause of their fury. If an angry character isn’t aware of why he’s so angry, he might display the following:

  • Attacking a scapegoat to deflect anger
  • Redirecting violence toward others
  • Retaliatory actions, hitting back
  • Physical damage to persons or property
  • Physical damage to himself

An aggressively angry character has not learned how to recognize his triggers. He does not manage the symptoms of anger. What are those? That’s next.

Physical Symptoms of an Angry character

If you have an angry character who has dealt with anger long-term, there are physical effects. While more than anger can cause the following symptoms, they are an indicator that something is wrong on a deeper level, beyond the physical.

  • Anxiety
  • Feeling of dread
  • Lethargy
  • Muscle tension
  • Headaches
  • Muscle pain
  • Memory impairment
  • Loss of concentration
  • Routine tasks become difficult
  • Rapid breathing
  • Nausea
  • Sleep deprivation

To show your angry character struggling with life, add some of these symptoms in what may seem an unrelated area. Readers will pick up on these clues. This is one way to show, not tell. That being said, it’s not wrong to name the emotion, because your character may recognize it, or recognize what he thinks he’s feeling.

However, he might not realize that the emotion he’s feeling comes from a deep-seated anger. And if he does, he might think it’s with someone other than the true person who’s angered him. The emotion might be clear and distinct, but its root is not.

Characters are people. When written true to life, they can have hidden emotions. Here's how to reveal an angry character. #Book Click To Tweet

Excerpt: Angry Character

In this scene from Bringer of Chaos: Forged in Fire, the immortal Pietas is about to face his father. Though hardly a child (he’s 1900 years old), that same feeling he’d experienced since youth dogs his steps. Pietas has ducked under a small waterfall to clean up How do you write an angry character? #AmWriting #SciFi #MFRWhooksbefore joining others. His human friend, Six, joins him.

Six waded into the pond, stuck a hand under the falls, screwed up his face, and stepped beneath the water. He sprang back out and danced around, shivering and swearing.

Pietas bit his lower lip to keep from laughing out loud. “That might have been the shortest shower in the history of mankind.”

“That’s freezing! How can you stand there with liquid ice pouring over you?”

“Discipline.”

“Yeah?” Six sloshed through the pool. “I figured out something. You Ultras are supposed to be genetically enhanced. You ask me, they packed more strength genes into you by yanking out the genes for hot, cold, and sleep.” He pulled off his shirt and wrung it out. Even in the lessening light, the teal dragon tattoo across his back showed. He put the shirt back on, muttering about ice water the entire time.

Pietas stayed under the numbing flow, wishing it had the power to numb his dread. He faced every fear, ignored every pain, refused to permit regret any place in his life. But dread? Dread dogged his steps. No matter how hard he fought, dread seeped into his life, insinuated itself under his skin, and muddied his decisions.

Dread soiled him.


How have you used anger in a character’s arc? Leave a comment below. Be sure to click other links in the hop!


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This week’s MFRW BookHooks offers a sneak peek at Bringer of Chaos: Forged in Fire, my upcoming military science fiction novel with romantic elements. In this scene, the not-quite-human Six offers a canteen of water to the immortal king. Four other immortals are watching. The scene is from Pietas’s point of view.

Canteen

A canteen of water and a friend #Pietas #SciFi #MFRWHooksSix slid their canteen off over his head and held it out to Pietas.

Accepting anything from a human, an altered one at that, had violated every instinct at first. To take from an enemy, yes. Always. Let one give you something as if you needed it? Admit a weakness before an enemy?

Never.

But this was Six.

Pietas took it.

Ultras could go days without water, but they consumed it when they had it. He wiped one dusty hand across his mouth. The satisfaction of assuaged thirst never failed to please. What simple things in life brought pleasure! In captivity, he’d dreamed of even a drop to cool his tongue. He’d sworn he’d never take water for granted again.

Six had offered water to their companions during the climb, but the entire lot refused anything a mortal’s lips had touched. Yes, Six was a quasi-immortal, but to the others, that gave him even less status.

Pietas wavered on few things, but on this? Should he call the man human, mortal, quasi-immortal, or ghost? He’d elected to choose as the mood struck. But one in particular annoyed Six.

“Thanks, ghost.” He thrust the canteen against Six’s chest.

Staggering, he swore in Spanish. “Find another name for me.”

“Tell me your mortal name then.”

“You know I can’t.” Six scratched his cheek. “Gotta protect my family. If your kind knew who they were, they’d slaughter them. You wouldn’t, but them?”

Now they were getting somewhere. “So you do trust me?”

“Pi, there’s more honor in your left big toe than your entire race combined.” He tipped up the flask but then paused. “No offense.”

“None taken. But we’re stranded, my friend. Unless a miracle happens, by the time we get off this world, your family will be long dead.” He added, “No offense.”

Six finished his drink and plugged the container. “None taken. Sorry. Can’t do it.” He lifted the strap back over his head and settled it onto his shoulder, the canteen at his back. “Seriously, Pi, your people hear you call me you-know-what, it’ll give away I was Ghost Corps. We both know what they’ll do to me.”

Admit a weakness before an enemy? Never. But this was Six. #SciFi #Pietas Click To Tweet


Bringer of Chaos: Forged in Fire
What if you were marooned on a barren world? No food. Few survival tools. You’re genetically engineered. No matter how agonizing the wound, you survive. No matter how you die, you come back.
It could be worse. You could be here alone. But that’s the problem. You’re not.

Available for preorder on Amazon Nov 11-Dec 28. Purchase on Dec 29, 2017
Free on Kindle Unlimited http://amzn.to/2ABIcCI

Join the Forged in Fire tour and get free goodies! 

A canteen of water and a friend #Pietas #SciFi #MFRWHooks

 


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